Yesterday I learned things about myself I didn't really know. My parents said that every time they fought i would scream and cry profusely. Also, my mom, in fights with my dad, would just up and leave for hours on end and I remember always wondering if this was the time that she wasn't coming back home. I almost always thought that the fighting was my fault cuz often their fights were about us kids (or so i thought because our names were brought up).
So I've learned: first, that fighting has negatively affected me since I was little...and let me tell you, my parents fought ALOT. Every day, about seemingly everything. All this from a child's mindset mind you. I cannot possibly truly know the extent of my parents' arguments. And second, that leaving in the middle of an argument has frightened me because I was afraid my mother wasn't coming back. One of the things, in arguments with my husband, I do is...in any way possible, I try to not let my husband leave during an argument. I am very afraid that that time he will not come back. I know and recognize that it is healthy and beneficial to step away from an argument before it gets worse. And thankfully I have a husband who not only recognizes it, but acts upon it. I have harmed our relationship by forcing him to stay and causing our fights to go from bad to worse. I need God's help in correcting this behavior of mine that will not take a time-out in fights. It is absolutely necessary.
Please dear Jesus, help me! I love my husband and i see now where I went wrong in our own arguments. I am in turn causing pain in my own childrens' lives. Help me learn how to argue appropriately with my husband. Help my husband be patient with me and teach me how to argue with him. We will definitely have disagreement, but I desire for those to be productive and make us a better, closer couple.
I love my husband!
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